Monday, June 13, 2011


Tonight it is 3:00 am and most people are sound asleep yet I sit here wide awake. Yesterday the dr. discovered a mass on the pineal gland in my brain. They diagnosed it as a probable pineal cyst. Sounds simple right. Only thing is that the pineal gland is so far in the brain and so far to get to that it is one of the most difficult surgeries to perform. Do they know for sure that it is a cyst--no. Does the One who made me and place every hair on my head know--yes.

I had a pretty good day. Amazing worship at church today. Our church family gathered together--we cried, we prayed, we hugged. I saw christian love in action. I am so thankful for the body of believers the Lord has brought our way. We had friends over for dinner. My mind was occupied so I didn't have time to think about the constant pressure in my head. Then I went to bed.

Going to bed is taking on a whole new meaning to me. When I lie down the pressure in my head becomes so intense I can barely stand the pain. Glenn, David, and I knelt at the foot of the bed and prayed asking God to grant me sleep. He did--for a couple hours. After a couple hours I woke up covered in sweat and my head feeling as if it was going to explode. I tried to pretend my way out of it and go back to sleep--no such luck. Now I sit here.

I have so many thoughts about what is going on right now. I am not really sure what to think or how to react. Not really sure how to deal with what is going on. I feel scared yet comforted. Anxious yet calm. Depressed yet encouraged. It is so weird.

I do know that no matter what happens I will continue to serve the Lord and bring glory to His name. I believe that He is a God of miracles and that He alone can grant a miracle in this situation. Please join with me in praying for a miracle.

1 comment:

  1. praying for you! I cannot even imagine the pain and uncertainty you must be facing right now. not to mention you are mommy to three very active littles who need you. (hugs)